Jillian Michaels Cardio Kickbox

Jillian Michaels Cardio Kickbox

What is it with workout videos and 1970s bow-chica-bow-bow music? With all the fabulous dance cardio tracks out there, why choose something that reminds me of when Debby Does Dallas was all the rage? Brings me back to my borrowed and treasured copy of Judy Blume’s Forever… But I digress…  I’m sure with the money from Jillian’s vast athletic empire she could whip up a good musical soundtrack, but then I thought that maybe, just maybe, she secretly loves 1970s bow-chica-bow-bow music and wants to subliminally implant its rhythmic beat into our brains.

Once I got over the horrid soundtrack, I dove into the workout. She’ll make you sweat while she fusses and hollers back at her workout companions for slacking. She’s a big fan of jumping jacks and jump ropes though, and given my busty and wiggly state, I don’t share her passion. At some point though, I’m hoping there won’t be as much skin flopping. That’s why I’m here, right? She does every exercise in either a count of 10 or a count of 30. I never felt that I was just going to give out like I did during the CafeMom’s Cardio Workout. I adore standing abdominal exercises, and she definitely brought it with this workout. At the end, one of her workout minions sarcastically remarks, “That’s it?” and Jillian barks to everyone to do another 30 second round of jumping jacks, jump ropes and 10 push-ups. What?! So I get punished for Miss Mouthy back there? Oh, wait. This is a video. I can tell Jillian to stick it and hit pause! But no, I suffered like the rest of them and bounced my way to completion.

It does have its drawbacks. Again, my martial arts training raises my hypersensitivity to the way these instructors do their kicks. Kickboxing videos should not assume that people know how to do these moves and just launch into them. If the instructors do want to forge ahead, they should have some disclaimer that states that the video is for intermediate and advanced viewers and is for an audience that understands kickboxing basics. Also, Jillian wimped out on moves with the upper body. Yeah, we did a bunch of punches, but they really weren’t a big roo-ha-ha, and the uppercut segment thrown in at the end seemed more like an afterthought.

Because of Jillian’s poor choice in background music, her signature militant attitude and lack of upper body segments, I give this video a rating of 2.5 dumbbells on a scale of 5.

Willing to subject yourself to Jillian’s masterpiece? Come on back here and let me know what you think!

5 Reasons I Like to Work Out

5) I really like the feel of sweat running down my back. Even more, I like the shower that follows.

4) You never know what you’re gonna get with each video. Plus, I get to make fun of the workout leader later ;)

3) My shorts are looser around my waist.

2) I can mark it off as a job well done on my calendar.

1) I’m working off my sins the good old fashioned (but effective!) way – with diet and exercise. Plus, it allows me to keep sinning. Always a bonus!